Chemo, bullies, and meds! Oh my!

My last few days have been quite difficult, as I wind down from my chemo cycle. This one was a little more difficult. It wreaked havoc on my stomach, feet, hands, joints, even my eyes were dry. But I am blessed with only one more round to go.  Hopefully that is the end of the little shit. I got enough rollin’ around in my head, I don’t need an extra lump of bad cells with a stupid medical name like oligodendroglioma. Who the hell comes up with those God-awful names anyway?  You know it’s stupid long when you lose your letter count half way through. Or maybe that’s just me, because of the dumb thing.

Anyway, I had to take some long naps, lounge in my jammie’s and listen to the sounds of my home for a few days to re-ground myself.  I also had good much needed conversations with a dear friend who reminded me that I have had an incredibly long 18 months. And I can handle a slip-up backwards sometimes. Not quite to the shit canyons, maybe a smaller poop crater.  I’m starting to get my teeter tooter levelled out again. Tomorrow will be better. We are blessed to start again tomorrow with a blank slate.

This is what was on my mind all day today.  We have to remember that people that try to drag us down are themselves sad, lonely, and insecure. These people don’t like our high teeters. It is intimidating to them. And can be very powerful for us to remember. These are the ones who have got too comfortable in their shit canyons, decided they liked it there (maybe it’s easier for them than doing the work to dig out of it) and try to do a recruitment, in a way. To pull us back down, when we know that flowers grow up, and smell much better. Even if you try and try to help them, they don’t want to hear it. They are the bully. In school, at the malls, at work, at home sometimes, in book clubs, out at bars or clubs,  they can disguise themselves anywhere. But we have the one thing they forgot they had: value. We value ourselves, and our dear family and friends. We value our many fortunes we have been given (& not just $$).  I will never allow anyone to take my value from me again.  I will teach our children that THEIR value is also to be respected and cherished. And priceless. God, I love my babies. All my babies, my own & and ones that are like my own.

There is no amount of $$ that can replace this value in my life.

Let’s all live a little more,

Donna

ps- teeter tooters wasn’t a typo 😊